Wednesday, January 7, 2009

ahlam, musawa, gishaf - "dreams, equality, freedom of movement"

this will probably be my last post, as i return home tomorrow. i tried to post some photos but ended up having to load them onto flickr if you want (and know how to) look at them - username is palhealth.

i leave with a heavy heart, jokingly in my mind i thought for a moment heavy enough to weigh the plane down, sitting surrounded by laughing - even cheering israelis. israeli security definitely questioned me a couple of times but i found it easy to play clueless, and they didn't seem to be too wary of me. but they were really concerned that i might have met and actually befriended anyone on the other side of their apartheid wall. making sure no one gave me anything, etc. i played along...

my last couple of days were spent finishing the training in alrowwad giving a couple of treatments and traveling back to harduf to see harry and channah one last time.

i met a beautiful woman named samira who came to the first training but had tremendous back pain and couldn't stay for the other one. i arranged to give her a treatment later. it seemed people had been excited from the first training and a few of them were really good and i hope they can try to start treatments when they comfortable enough. i had become friends with marwa who is the women's unit coordinator and she was excited to continuing practicing so that she could start treating women in a group setting. we talked of many things and after spending the time i have with the women there i have so much respect. they all feel overburdened and they seem to keep their households together while also working always feeling like they have so much to do with children, home, etc. so strong.

i had one of my most profound experiences that last day in aida camp. i had only given a handful of treatments while on my visit and realized so much from them. after using only one needle on my friend i realized body acupuncture is too moving sometimes for people who are constantly bombarded with trauma in daily life. it made me have so much more appreciation for the simplicity and effectiveness of the auricular treatments. i did a simple treatment mainly just using acupressure. her body trembled and shook as she tried to keep back the emotions and tears streamed. her young daughter came in and out throughout the treatment, looking at her mother and smiling at me. when she saw her mother crying she took her hands and kissed her forehead while i continued the treatment. it was a really beautiful moment.

after the treatment she felt like she couldn't get up, i think it's because she finally had a moment to rest. she told me she doesn't like to cry in front of others especially her children because she wants to be strong for them, and with what is happening in gaza she had been holding so much in. she remembered the exact moment when she began shutting things out and not being able to express herself. she was 17 and she had heard that a settler in hebron had shot 2 villagers. she broke down in the middle of the street wailing with her sister trying to tell her to get a hndle on herself. she said she really hadn't been able to express her feelings openly since then. she asked if i had been here before because she said from the first moment she saw me something was so familiar - my face, laugh and my smile. i cry now with how much that touched me. as i left we joked about how it was nice meeting 'again' she looked so different afterwards. i asked her to be easy on herself and rest for as long as she could. she often suffers from insomnia, stress and back pain. as i left she called in to her daughter who brought me out a beautiful scarf so i wouldn't forget her - as if i could, she taught me so much about living.

i was overwhelmed by sadness at the thought that we are all sensitive beings and being forced to live in such oppressive, unhealthy situations as caused by occupation they are not allowed to feel the same way as those of us who have the luxury to. they have to shut themselves off from the pain that surrounds them daily, to continue on living and provide the best care they can for their beloved children so that maybe they will have a better life. but slowly as we shut out pain we start to shut out other feelings as well, especially when the pain in overwhelming, as it is for most living in their country, a country they love, palestine. she had told me of having a few instances where she just 'shut down'. she could hear everything but couldn't move or respond. her husband worried and took her to the doctor for a brain scan but they found nothing, because the cause is not physically perceptible. it comes from a caging of the spirit. just being there a couple of weeks and making many frends and having intimate conversations with them about this has brought such an awareness of the true inhumanty that is occuring. and they all hope for the same - a future that will let their children live freely and in equality with those who 'share' their homeland, not being treated as 'second class' citizens. a term i am disgusted even exists. please try to remember the individuals whenever confronted with the question of whether war is ever justified. haven't we learned that violence against any harms us all, even if we aren't aware of the direct effects of it. and we will never be free unless all are.

fuck alan dershowitz

okay last post about the news. i found that aljazeera in english is probably one of the better news stations i've ever watched they seem to have pretty balanced coverage with less biased interpretations.

over the last few days the news has been a constant presence in homes, shops, restaurants, etc. arabic and english. but it's been interesting to watch events unfold and watch as the first account gets distorted. there was coverage of the 3 israeli soldiers who died in "friendly fire" a news reporter standing with israeli troops on the border of gaza near where it happened had just talked to them and found out that the 3 israeli soldiers had taken shelter from heavy fighting in a building that the army targeted. she then went on to mantion it's implications of the israeli army not having proper knowledge of their targets and good ground communication with troops in battle. at the end of her report the flash at the bottom of the screen said "3 israeli troops killed in errant tank fire" i wonder which story made it to international press.

then i saw a debate between a female palestinian rights activist and alan dershowitz. he kept condemning hamas saying the children dying are their faults citing international law regarding hostage takers being at fault when police kill a hostage. as if international law has ever been followed here. and he kept getting really dramatic about everything saying what would you do if bombs were being dropped in your schoolyards, and israel has a right to defend itself against those who don't think it should exist, i kept thinking - "which side is he talking about", it's fucked up that you can defend the actions of one by stating something applicable to both. the woman replied calmly that it was impossible to have a real conversation if he kept being dramatic and that this was not a hollywood movie. she pointed out that one of the reasons for the actions of hamas has been in response to the year and a half blockade of gaza since it was democratically elected and that israel does not respect the rights of palestinians or recognize them as a state. he replied with the falsity - of course israel recognizes palestine. are you kidding me? i've seen again and again with the coverage of this was in the west that they really do believe that if you say something enough, the truth has no bearing. and the way in which he addressed any of her questions was by invalidating them. i wish i could find the video, if i do i'll post it.

i wish i could do this justice it was laughably inaccurate on his part but gave tremendous insight into how anyone who supports what is going actually believes. disgusting.

looking at the history (or the brief history that i know) hamas was democratically elected - yes extreme but still democratically elected by a people living under tremendous pressure from an occupying force. then israel blocked its borders because it didn't like the government chosen by those people, supported internationally because they are a known "terrorist" organization. not letting in food - it rotted waiting days to be let in, medical supplies, fuel, etc. hamas has had one continuos demand since this began - end the blockade. it declared a 6 month cease fire in which nothing changed and when it was lifted it continued lauching rockets into the parts of israel it could reach. horrendous as any violence is, what happens when the needs of a people are continuosly not met or addressed, they start acting out. hamas is very stubborn and has violent extreme ways of dealing with these issues which is unexcusable but that still does not justify any of the actions israel has taken that has ended up hurting the people and continuing the cycle of violence and created more support for any "leadership" which is trying to change the situation. and when violence is what you are treated with it seems to be the way in which you respond. from what i've heard many palestinians in the west bank do not support hamas, they are stubborn and not serving the needs of the people. but once again we need to look at the causes that have let such a government take power.

and in response to that look at the right wing extreme government elected by the israeli people, just because they aren't labeled "terrorists" doesn't mean there actions aren't just as reprehensible. they killed 100+ people yesterday, bombed a UN school. watching the news you see blood spattered streets, the still functionaing hospitals can't take care of everyone. the bloodbath continues and the UN security council is talking about it in the lounge over coffee and cigarettes. wtf?

i can't talk about this anymore. i've thrown up twice today since arriving back in israel. seeing the soldiers who i know play a game with...whenever i see someone that i think they might mess with i go up and ask inane questions until they pass. maybe they wouldn't have harassed them anyway...who knows after what i've seen. and then seeing a tank in transport next to the bus i was in. i've luckily never seen one up close until now. unlike my friend yosef who had his leg blown off by one in front of al rowwad center in 2001, but at least he really enjoys playing wheelchair basketball. i bet he liked being able to run and jump too.

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

don't forget jenin

over the last few days i have travelled thru the most secured checkpoint to get into jenin and travelled through the west bank from jenin to bethlehem.

i went to jenin with the plans of working at a hospital there called patients friends hospital. we were set up in the physiology department. it's not very busy and it was best if i just treated women. jenin is the most conservative place i've been to so far. i only saw one woman without her head covered. there was definitely the awareness that there are not many foreigners who come.

if you aren't familiar with jenin, i suggest you look up it's history. for many years it was a strongly resistant to the israeli occupation, in april of 2002 israeli soldiers 'cleaned it up' in what has become known as the jenin massacre. simialr to what is happening today in gaza. under the auspices of getting rid of terrorists israel entered te jenin refugee camp and literally flatenned an area of the town the size of a few football fields, in it's 'fight' with palestinian gunmen. medical teams were not allowed in until after the 'clean up' was finished. when human ights and medical teams were allowed back in what they found was dead bodies and rubble. there was much propaghanda in the western press trying to justify israel's actions and downplay the extent of the damage and civilian casualties.

it is much different today, but there is a sense of heaviness everywhere you go. we were invited to stay with one of the physiologists in his town of anin just north 20km of jenin. it was a different experience than any other i have had so far, except the hospitality which i have come so much to appreciate here. expecially being a woman in a place where men and women stay seperated most of the time. at first many of the older men did not know how to interact with me but as we sat and talked soon we were laughing and they were calling me over to show me things and eat together. talking about what was happening in gaza and similar conversations i have had with many. typically families live together - building one story on top of another for each of the sons to live in when they have married. it was a beautiful house with a balcony on top that had a lovely view of sunrise and sunset as well as a neighboring town in 'israel' that abdala's father works in. he used to be able to travel to work walking there in 15 minutes, but the view also included the boundaries defined by an electric fence where i'm sure they will build the wall when they get the chance. it outlined the entire hillside to the west of our view. so know his father has to travel 10 hours to get to his place of work 5km from his home. he stay there most the time now and only comes home for a few days every couple of months. and to compound things further palestinian workers in israel don't have any rights. he works in construcion and does amazing tile work. he worked for 5 months and on a project and then never got paid. and he has no legal recourse to get what he deserves. so not only does he not see his family but for all his efforts he can't even provide for them. jenin and the outlying towns are very poor. there is no work, so most of the men travel far to try to provide for their families.

one of the older gentleman i met invited me over to treat his daughter with cereral palsey which seems to be very common in jenin. much more than i have heard in other areas. we had met with two doctors from the jenin refugee camp about treating the children there and they said most of them would be cerebral palsey patients. i treated her and we were offered a second dinner with olives and olive oil made in the village. it was the best olive oil i have ever tried.

when night came i went downstairs to sleep with his mother and sisters. it was almost like a slumber party. they were so excited to ask me many questions. we stayed up for hours communicating with their little english and my very little arabic. but we had fun and laughed. i get the feeling i was something very different to them. expecially being 29 and not married with a family. which has been another common topic of conversation. when we finally got to sleep the youngest daughter,iman, woke 3 times in the night with screams and asking for her mother to comfort her. i saw first hand how the young are affected even before they can intellectually understand the events around them they embody and are gripped with the fear.

in the morning we returned to the hospital and tried to contact the unrwa medical treatment facility which we heard has over 700 patients a day. but they were not interested in our services so we headed back towards bethlehem, which i think worked out best so i could finish the training to help people quite smoking at al-rowwad center in aida camp.

travelling through the west bank we passed at least 5 or 6 checkpoints and travelled along the wall in some area for quita a distance. at every checkpoint the first israeli soldier you see has his gun trained on every car that passes. someimtes you are stopped and questioned and other times they let you through somewhat quicker. but often times you have to wait for long periods of time. you see gates on evera road that they can easily shut is they don't want to allow travel between the areas at all. on our way we passed one of the biggest settlements and the army presence was the most i had seen so far. they were atop al the hills always with hands on there guns, talking and laughing, but always prepared to use it. the roads we travelled were bumpy and winding and i got to see the large well cared for roads used by he settlers that are in the west bank but not allowed for palestinian travel. i'm sure they get to use there 'highways' for quick and easy passage that easily takes palestinians at least 3 to 4 times longer depending on the conditions of the roads and how difficult the checkpoints are that day.

Monday, January 5, 2009

history repeats

as i watch the news daily and the numbers of those killed and injured (on both sides) increases, sometimes by the minute, the details keep repeating. so far close to 600 palestinians have been killed and 1 israeli confirmed dead. the injured are 2500 in gaza and "in the tens" for israelis. it's like a macabric scoreboard. and israel continues saying it's defensive and they won't stop until their military objectives are obtained - to stop the missile launches by hamas. while hamas is trying to defend it's people as well.

each time they record whole families are the latest to be killed or most of families - whole families wiped out, some of the latest were paremedics trying to help the injured. and the injured are dying waiting for treatment. puting it in terms of the injured allows people to dissociate from the impact on their lives, because they are still living. but the injured consists of missing appendages, eyes, brain damage, etc. not cuts and bruises. i saw video footage from a hospital with a young child - wide eyed, in shock as his parents described what they had just witnessed and endured. he had blood spattered acroos his face, as did his brother, his siter had a bloody cloth over her eye that her father held there while holding her in his lap. the mother had both hands in bloody bandages. and this is as israel continues to play the role of defender and saying that it is only targeting military objectives - which now seems to extend to anyone who might grow up to struggle against the cruelty, and those who raise them.

how many times do we have to make the same mistakes. the holocuast, berlin wall, south african apartheid, etc. after the end we are ready to recognize that it is wrong, when are we going to wake up and stop it as it happens and hopefully next time not allow it happen at all. i am also reminded of what happened to the native peoples of america when it was formed. millions were massacred and drove off land to live in small reservations and lose their culture. now we see it for what it was and are saddened by the facts of our history. history is being made now. how is this not the same? they fought and defended the land that another claimed as their own, by a people considered terrorists to the government it broke away and declared freedom from. i would rather our history say that we came back from the brink and truly allowed others to be self-governed.

Saturday, January 3, 2009

"it has begun"

(this post was started on the 4th)

i attended 2 protests yesterday against the war in gaza - the first in sakhnin and then we got on a bus and headed to the one in tel aviv.

sakhnin is an arab town in the northern part of israel. the residents there although technically israeli citizens are not treated as such. israel has taken the land surrounding the town, literally on each of the edges - there is an army base, an industrial center, and an olive grove. the residents feel strangled - their town hasn't been able to expand since the nakba (disaster) of '48. the young adults of the town are forced to move out because of no space to live and the land available is too expensive for anyone to afford and no one can find jobs. i met with a resident of the town, mustafa, who gave me the history and provided me with a indispensable resource during the demonstration. he told me this is typical of arab towns within israel. the arab residents are not allowed to work within certain jobs - such as electricity, and they are not given the same support theough funding for infrastructure as jewish israeli residents. and as they are forced to move out into jewish communities they often suffer from severe racism.

on the way isralei police were everywhere in large numbers.

the march was peaceful and huge - i could not see either end the entire time i was there. mustafa said it was the largest seen in sakhnin. there were palestinian protest chants of - "gaza - don't be shaken "be still", "let us change, let us change - the law of the jungle", "you have taken our land, our freedom, even though we bleed we keep fighting", etc. i heard there was an estimated 10,000 people at it, but little to no coverage of it internationally. i found an article on it linked to the right. it was quite amazing to be a part of. it's hard to describe the feeling of love and truth that was felt in solidarity asking for peace and an end to killing.

from there there was a bus leaving for the rally that night in tel aviv, i went with my new friend mirja with a group of arab-israeli protestors. the entire way down we sang the songs i have come to recognize of palestinian spirit not easily defeated. the march in tel aviv had a much different feel and i'm thankful for being able to experience both. in tel aviv the chants were for peace not war and unity of palestine and israel. people threw eggs from there apartments that overlooked the streets and there were small groups of counter-protestors waving the israeli flag in a manner that reminded me of a young child throwing something in the face of another. and although the protest just asked for peace and the end to killing the counter-protestors were vehemently yelling at us. but the israeli army and police present did a good job of keeping them seperated and quiting them down. but at the end when we gathered at the cinematech were the buses were parked we seperated from the group to find our bus with an arab friend muofa (sp?) he had a sign about no blood of the children being spilled. we were standing by the buses - just the 3 of us when some of the counter-protestors started coming. at first it was just a few. they would pass us and then look back and after reading his sign started yelling at us - "go to gaza", "fuck you". if only they knew i would go to gaza if i thought i would be let in and thought i might be able to offer help or bring supplies. i just responded with one of the few words i know - shalom, which pissed them off even more. then i got a little worried as more came and started climbing over a fence and trying to push through a locked gate. more and more of them yelled at us so we made our way back to the bulk of the protestors as the israeli police came to keep the counter-protestors back.

when we got in the bus to return it was slow going and the pro-israeli flag wavers follwed our buses and spit on us while yelling many things i couldn't interpret but got the gist of. the held up there middle fingers, held there hands around there crotches, and slit at their throats towards us. it was intensely disgusting, just because we ask for people not to be killed. it allowed me to see the underlying aggression that allows for such wars to be waged. how much hate. when i returned to where i was staying i was told - "it has begun". they had entered gaza with ground troops on the day of the protests - what assholes. so as internationally the cry of outrage is rising israel contends that its actions are defensive. but i just learned today that they had created a replica of gaza to train troops in weeks ago - BEFORE the end of the cease fire. so as far as i can tell they were just waiting for any excuse to enter.

Friday, January 2, 2009

on my way here

when i was in al-quds (jerusalem) the man at the internet cafe, mohammad, and i talked of many things. he says he enjoys meeting people like me who are interested in learning the truth about the situation. he invited me to return if i make it through there again so he can show me the area of abu dis. people live in jail there. it is literally imprisoned by the israeli military - if they need to leave they have to call the military to open the gates. and often times they come only when they want to. so once again people are trapped in their own homes, at the whims of others. i hope to meet up and talk with him more sometime. when i left he told me of a place to eat before leaving to meet hary in tel aviv.

on my way to the pizza place that has been family run for the last 35 years by an arab man and his family who have lived their entire lives in al-quds, i saw an israeli military person stopping everyone who looked arabic and making them show them their i.d. and when i arrived at the shop their was a group of 10-12 military people harassing people trying to pass. they would stop them and ask for their i.d.'s and even if they provided the right credential they took many over to the corner and made them stand up against the wall and pat them down. if they asked why the military person elbowed them in the face or stomach and told them to shut up. a woman asked for the soldier who was harassing her for his name, he said michal (sp?) and said "but they just call me rambo". i heard them tell others - "fuck you" or "you son of a bitch" as they hit them while searching them, for no reason other than their arabic features and names.

when i got into the pizza place, the owner was understably upset by the events right outside his place of business. i asked him if their was a reason, he said they had been doing this since the war in gaza began. i watched what happened outside and everytime they looked at me i just returned with a scowl. i tried to take some pictures but the light was too low for many of them to turn out. i got to have many conversations with the owner and his family, he turned on the news and 12 more had died earlier that day from more bombings in gaza. we talked again about the skewed coverage that occurs in the media. it's the same with any war - we keep track of every number of deaths of the side we support but the others remain countless and nameless. so far - (and it may be more today) 412 palestinians have been killed in gaza and 1800 wounded, 4 israelis have been killed and 6 wounded. the hospitals do not have the means to care for them all. and he expressed what so many others have, who knows if we will be here next year or even tomorrow. he told me of a man yesterday who had been stopped in the same manner and asked for his i.d. the man was 35 and had a beard. the guard who stopped him said this isn't you, where's the beard in the picture. before the man could protest the soldier took him around the corner and beat him. when he was done he threw the i.d back at him and said "my mistake, i guess it is you" and laughed.

after relating the stories and watching the news together the owner said "what can we do?", "what you hear and what you see are 2 different things, please tell others".

and so i sit in a kibbutz in north israel and feel like i am betraying all those i have met in some way. on my ride to tel aviv i was in a shared taxi between a paramilitary person and a security guard, the radio played "heal the world" by micheal jackson. how fucking ironic. i (almost) felt shame telling my palestinian friends that i was headed to tel aviv and then to stay in a kibbutz, knowing that many of them can't ever (and will probably never want to) go to these places that are symbols against their humanity and home.

everyone i have met hear has asked my experiences in israel so far, when i tell them where i have been and the warmth of my experiences they seem a little confused, but aren't you scared to travel there? i tell them no and let them know of the people i have met and the friends i have made. they live thinking all palestinians are wanting to harm them, and with the fear of missiles from hamas and hezbollah, in this land where anything can happen. the family i am staying with are amazing, hary, his wife channah, and their oldest daughter have all been so nice and give me a different perspective, i look forward to what i will learn from them as well. their son david is in the army and he comes home to visit tonight.

people are people and we need to start treating everyone with respect and supporting life not guided by label and dogmatic ideologies.


every day i am confronted with hope and the feeling of hopelessness, love and anger

in talking with people here about how the traumatic events experienced by the people of gaza during the bombardment that continues for the last week we often find ourselves talking about what the children teach us in this conflict. there are the stories from those who experience it first hand and those who are secondarily affected by it (most of us).

while watching the events unfold in gaza there is an urgency that i think is hard for most of us to identify with, especially if we have not experienced events that give us the reference for it ourselves. that may be why it is so easy to say -"israel has a right to defend itself". in that case why is the right to defend not extended to all peoples? and the right to defend does not equal the right to massacre. the people of gaza are dying daily and running out of supplies. in all the years of the conflict i have been told that what is going on now is the most extreme abuse of human rights that has been seen. and i have heard that most of the news (especially in the states) focuses on the fact that 4 israelis have been killed and that is the validation for the horrific acts that continue in gaza. as far as i can tell if we just look at the definition of words: israel is the real terrorist - one who uses or advocates terror:

1. intense, sharp, overmastering fear
2. an instance or cause of intense fear or anxiety; quality of causing terror
3. any period of frightful violence or bloodshed likened to the Reign of Terror in France.
4. violence or threats of violence used for intimidation or coercion
5. Informal. a person or thing that is especially annoying or unpleasant.

in the bombing of a mosque that happened days ago the reason stated by the israeli government was because two members of hamas were standing outside of it. while they succeeded in destroying the mosque, the 2 "members of hamas", and whoever was inside - the bombing also destroyed the house next door of a family of 10, mother, father, 2 sons, 6 daughters. in it were the 6 sisters, earlier that day the oldest sister had told her family - "i think we will die". she watched her other 5 sisters die in the explosion, and was the only one to survive.

i was told ghandi said - the best war against war is the children.

we are talking about death here: children, people, our neighbors, our families. maybe some find it easy to say it's not my family, i feel sorry for them if they think like that and are so easy to seperate yourself from the suffering of another. just because we don't live with the iminent threat let us not devalue the lives that have been lost and the many others who have been damaged: physically, emotionally , and mentally, probably never to recover. these are not just numbers on a tv. each one is you and me and someone that we love and will miss. and who knows what their life might have brought, we will never know. and in that the tragedy influences the lives of all those who survive. we need to stop blaming the actions and start looking at what is causing them, and what we are doing to support it, tacitly or otherwise.

i saw an interview with a woman and her 5 children. the children will not leave her side, they stand outside the door when she goes to the bathroom and everytime she leaves their sight they think she is dead. and she shares a sentiment that many do in gaza, that they will die at any moment. most have not left there home in days since the onslaught has begun, only briefly to get supplies. and many of them wonder if today is the day they will die and they say, they want die at home and with their families. can you imagine as a mother or parent not being able to assure the saftey of your kids and how that must make them feel?

this is very hard for me to write about - i have been nauseated and crying the last few days. and since i am often around others i find myself fighting back tears when i think of what they must be going through and feeling viscerally the impending doom of death that seems to wait. since being in the occupied land - "israel" i have had many mixed emotions, but what i've realized is we need to start seeing this on a humanistic level. wanting to support human rights and safety for palestinians is not anti-anyone else. when looking at the health of a society it should be measured by how well that society functions to fulfill the needs for a prosperous life of all individuals. at the very basic levels: food, shelter, and security. as humans we are failing miserably, not just here in palestine. how can we continue to live the way we do when we know that others are suffering and wondering if they might not see tomorrow. what happens to families when children don't feel they can be protected and parents feel hopeless and not able to provide safety for their children.

many people i have met in palestine were children during the 1st intifada and as they reflect on the effects that had on them they look to try to help the children now from having the same experiences. as safety is taken from them by seeing deaths on a daily basis, hearing bombs in the distance, seeing their parents fearful...they start thinking they have no one to count on, their parents can't protect them, expecting that wars are a part of life. as adults we have developed the coping mechanisms that will help us endure but the children need more and they deserve to be able to develop without the fear of death being just around the corner (literally). then they start seeing themselves through the political situation and less through self. the parents are distracted by news and the events and traumatized themselves, this leads to tense interactions. children need to be held and feel secure to develop into healthy adults with healthy relationships. they need to be able to express their feelings and be asked about what they are experiencing.

a man here in the west bank asked about letting his 4 year old daughter watch the news. she asked him to turn it on to watch what was happening in gaza. when he did she saw the footage of children and adults being carried out of rubble...she went to the tv and kissed it, while crying she said "i love gaza". he turned the tv off and she shouted at him to turn it back on, saying he didn't care about the people. he felt hurt by this because he was just trying to protect her. the lady presenting the lecture on maslow's pyramid and treating children after trauma told him to let her express her feelings by talking with her and try to get her to draw what is going on for her.

what kind of society are we creating that perpetuates events like these causing trauma to others and then wondering why they act out in childhood and when they become adults, trying to regain some sense of control over thier lives lost so early on.